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How does one critique a paradox? That is the torturous question I have been asking myself for the two and a half hours I have been putting off writing this review. 2gether is that rare, abnormal blip on the mainstream musical radar, a strange mutation of an already strange genre which steadily grows stranger every day. Allow me to take a moment to try and sum up the bubbly enigma which is 2gether.
We start with five actors (Evan Farmer, Kevin Farley, Noah Bastian, Michael Cuccione and Alex Solowitz) who are cast as the five elements (Jerry O'Keefe, Doug Linus, Chad Linus, Jason "Q.T." McKnight and Mickey Parke) of a boy band in a fluff ball film for MTV, called (natch) "2gether." The film, which is itself a loose parody of the teen-pop invasion, inspires a music video (of the single "U+Me=Us (Calculus)") and a tie-in album (with songs titled "Rub One Out" and "Say It (Don't Spray It)"); the TV-movie becomes a huge hit, the record enters the Billboard charts in the Top 50, and 2gether, a phony-baloney musical outfit, begins to receive heavy airplay on TRL, which is ground zero for the very type of music this band mocks. All of a sudden, 2gether are a phenomenon in the musical niche they are satirizing, and before you can say "Spinal Tap," these five young stallions are on a plane to L.A., ready to star in their own sitcom, record a new album, and make bucket-loads of cash for MTV.
Now, normally I would review Again under the same terms with which I would review any other comedy album. Bottom line: is it funny? However, a good third of this record is devoted to normal, comedy-less boy band tunes, further muddying the line between parody, homage, capitalist intentions, and just plain old weirdness. So what to do? What to do? Hmm...
Well, let me start by airing my perturbation: 2gether ain't never gonna fly as a boy band. Their "serious" songs, besides lacking emotional depth (normal for this musical genre), are simply not catchy, which is a must for any successful bubblegum-pop outfit. I'm not sure who's writing these weighty numbers, but somebody better call in Swedish sensation Max Martin to mentor these aural engineers, because they're floundering. Songs like "Every Minute, Every Hour" and "That's When I'll Be Gone" just fall flat: these are crappy sappy ballads. Also, and I don't think the actors portraying 2gether will take much offense to this, these guys just don't have the vocal chops of their esteemed counterparts. Jerry O'Keefe can't sing like Kevin Richardson; Jason "Q.T." McKnight is no Justin Timberlake.
That said, whoever was in charge of producing Again should give themselves a pat on the back: this is one of the funniest, goofiest and, most importantly, ballsiest albums I've heard in a while. My two biggest fears when I popped in this CD were: 1) that it wouldn't be funny and 2) that potentially hilarious, yet somewhat raunchy, satirical shots would be blown for the sake of the "virgin ears" of 2gether's teenage audience. Fear #1 was alleviated when I heard the second track, entitled "The Hardest Part of Breaking Up (Is Getting Back Your Stuff)" with lyrics like "you took my sweater, my hat/I can't find my cat." Fear #2 was thrown to the abyss when I first heard "Awesum Luvr," a song where the boys leer seductively over what is in essence porn music, singing lines like "Mary Kay Letourneau knew the truth/it's all the young dudes who got the best moves." Any comedy record which has the chutzpah to mention famed schoolteacher Letourneau in a number about horny teenagers has balls to spare. The jokey songs on this record are consistent, well-timed and, with the exception of the lackluster "Regular Guy," downright hilarious. "U&U&Me" is a fetching ode to a prime male fantasy, the almighty threesome, with lines like "Friday slumber parties when your parents are gone/I think about you girls/How we could get it on. "Right Where it Counts" is a rousing recounting of an awful relationship ("Why you so mean/girl, you ruptured my spleen.") I won't even begin to give away the underlying joke in the song "Sister," but let's just say it's original and extremely well-executed.
2gether's main problem, besides the fact that they're not really a band, is that producers are going to continue to ask them sing serious songs, songs which don't fit well into their comedic oeuvre. How are they to deal with this? There is one song on Again, entitled "I Wanna Know Your Name," which balances comedy and romanticism in a pitch perfect way ("Love is itching/just can't hide it/there's no cream out that can fight it.") If 2gether can continue to come out with songs with this sort of duality, maybe they can accomplish all that they are being asked too. Either way, Again is an energetic and silly, if minor, success.
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